Adopted
by alicehamesrose
Summary: The Weasley children start a tradition convincing the youngest that they were adopted, despite their distinctly red hair. Over time, the plot spirals. Includes the entire Weasley family.
1. Bill's Beginning

A/N: This story was based on this post on tumblr. You can follow me at .com. Apologies if the characterizations are a bit off, I don't have a lot of young children at my disposal.

It all started with Bill and Charlie. "I came from mama's tummy!" Charlie said, drawing circles on his bloated toddler belly. Bill looked down at him from the table where he ate alone as his mother was outside hanging out the sheets. "No, you didn't," Bill took a bite of toast. "Yes, I did!" Bill shrugged as he chewed. "Maybe you did. Maybe you came in a basket."

"How did I come in a basket?" Charlie shook his little head as if he found a hole in Bill's story. "You were adopted." Bill finished his toast and put it in the sink to be cleaned. Charlie looked up at him with his mouth dropped open. Bill sat down in the living room on the old couch that he could hear the springs strain as he sat down. Charlie followed and sat down and joined him. "Am I really a-apod-"

"Adopted?" Finished Bill, Charlie put his thumb in his mouth.

"Yeah," Charlie said, with his thumb covered in saliva.

"No," Bill said. "I was messing with you."

"Messing?"

"I was playing," explained Bill.

"It didn't seem like it," sulked Charlie, though he appeared to already have forgiven him as he leant against Bill's side. "I was playing pretend."

"You're really good."

"At pretend?"

"Yeah."


	2. Charlie Carries The Torch

"I like this photo of mummy," her belly was big and round and she laughed at something as the camera flashed. A pair of red headed boys run in and out of the photo. Charlie leaned over Percy to see the photo, "why?"

"Because I'm in there too!"

"That's not you, Perce," Charlie said. Percy went a little pink. "I'm in there, not you."

"Then how come… how come there are two boys? You and Bill."

"That was my cousin," said Bill disinterestedly from the breakfast table holding a mug of tea and reading his big boy book.

"You mean _our_ cousin," Percy wiggled his little head Bill's way.

"Yes, well, mine and Charlie's cousin."

"Barney, you wouldn't know him. He lives far away," Charlie added.

"Then where is a photo of me in mummy's belly?" Percy said.

"There isn't any. You were adopted."

"That's not true."

"How?" Bill asked as if he was interested in Percy's understanding of the matter.

"Because I-you don't know what that means,"

"Then what does it mean?"

Percy faltered. "It means mum took you from a family cause they couldn't afford you."

"But we're already poor!"

Charlie had to cover his face from laughing at Percy's honesty.

"How come I have red hair like you?"

Percy was good at this, probably because he is bit older than Charlie was when Bill played this prank on him. "People can be not-a-Weasley and have red hair, Perce," Bill said matter-of-factly and took a sip of his tea. "Then how come dad and me both wear glasses too!"

"People can have red hair and wear glasses at the same time, this is not a Weasley-exclusive thing, Perce," Bill sighed. Percy had enough, he stomped his little foot and burst into tears. Charlie turned around to look at Bill. "Hey! There's my boys!" There was Dad coming through the door. Percy was too caught up in the news to care and continued to cry as he gripped onto the photo. "Oh Percy, what's wrong?" Arthur grabbed Percy at his waist. "Charlie and Bill… Charlie and Bill say I'm not their brother!" Percy cried into the photograph of his mother laughing as the red-headed blurs raced around her. "Oh, that's not true! See that's you, in there! And that's Bill and Charlie running around!"

"Not it's not! It's Barney!"

Arthur laughed, "Who's this Barney? Bill and Charlie were just playing a little joke on you! Right, Charlie?"

"Yes," Charlie confirmed.

"See, Perce? Just a little joke!"

"Well, it wasn't funny!" Perce cried.

"You're right, it wasn't funny." Arthur turned Percy around, "boys, you took it too far, apologise."

Seeing poor little Percy's face as he cried behind his fogged-up glasses as he gripped tightly on the photo frame that held the precious photo made Charlie, and Bill, especially, feel very bad. "I'm sorry, Percy," said Charlie. "It was a joke Bill played on me when I was littler than you." Arthur shot up and held onto Percy's shoulders, "Oh Bill."

Bill stood up and walked over. "I'm sorry, Perce. We took it too far, you are our brother. We all came from the same tummy."

"Time for a hug!" announced their dad. They all encircled Percy and hugged him tightly, "We love you, Percy!" Charlie said.

"Enough! Enough!" Percy said and they broke away. "I forgive you, but don't do it again!"

Percy turned around to walk up the stairs and Arthur followed. "How about you keep that photo of you in your mummy's belly by your bed, since it's your favourite."

Percy nodded with a sniffle.


	3. Potato Gun

A/N: Sorry if the characterizations are bit off, Fred and George (I find) tend to be the most difficult characters to right because the reader of the Harry Potter series only sees them as a united teenaged team, we don't get much insight into their relationship to each other.

"I should be able to choose the weapon this time," said George unpacking their toy.

"Why should you? I'm oldest," Fred bragged.

"You don't know that," George said with the wind of his breath blowing through the hole left by his baby two front teeth of his top jaw.

"Yes, I do!" Fred shook his head like know-it-all Percy, wind blowing through the hole left by his baby two front teeth from his bottom jaw. This has got to be the only time in George and Fred's lives that people would be able to tell them apart.

"Percy!" George shouted.

"What." Percy came to the door at looked down at Fred and George building some kind of miniature war weapon. "Who's oldest?" George asked innocently.

"Yeah, Perce, who's oldest?"

Percy sighed and rolled his eyes, "I don't know."

"How could you not know? You carry the stopwatch around all the bloody time!" Fred said rudely.

"It's a pocket watch," Percy glared.

"Same thing," George shrugged.

"It is not!" Percy said hotly. "Anyway, I got it after you arrived."

"Charlie!" George roared.

Charlie arrived in a flash and leaned against the door, "I'm not going to be a test for another one of you man-made miniature weapons."

"This is not what this about," said Fred.

"Who's oldest?" asked George.

"Bill, then me, then-"

"No, of me and George."

"Dummy," said George.

"Don't call me a dummy, dummy. I don't know, to answer your question."

"That is not true," said Fred.

"We can see it in your eyes," agreed George.

Percy rolled his eyes and walked away from the door.

"Fine, we'll ask Bill," Fred acted like he had one-upped Charlie somehow. "BIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLLL," Fred howled and George joined in. "BILL! BILL! BILL! BILL! BILL! BILL!"

There was a thud of boots that jumped to the bottom step and then the landing. "You better shut up you know mum is real tired. What is it?"

"Who's oldest?"

"I am," said Bill without a beat.

"No, of me and George," said Fred.

"Oh… That," Bill looked at Charlie.

"Well, you see… Mum and dad didn't get there until after you were born."

"What? That makes no sense?" Fred eyed Bill suspiciously.

"Well, mum and dad were late to pick you up. They were very upset about it," explained Bill sincerely. "Pick us up from where? We came from inside the tummy, that's how it works."

"But not mummy's tummy."

"That's not true."

"Yes, it is, it's called adoption," explained Charlie.

"You said you didn't know," said George.

"I said I didn't know when you were born," Charlie corrected.

"Well, we're not adopted. We just want to know who's oldest?"

"I said I don't know! And you most definitely are adopted! You two and Perce, brothers? As if!"

"Maybe he's adopted," suggested Fred.

"We're more like you than him," nodded George.

"Trust me, I saw it all," said Bill giving off the impression he saw a lot the day Percy was born. "What's our real mummy's name then?"

"Karen," Charlie shrugged but something was off about his answer, the way he hesitated before saying the name.

Fred and George eyed each other.

"Ok," Fred shrugged.

"Thanks, Bill," George smiled. They seemed oddly content with their answer.

"Well, Fred and George seemed to tire themselves out today, doing what, I don't know," Molly said to Arthur as she put out the plates and he put the food on the table. "So, they had a nap."

"You're sure they're really tired?" said Arthur as he sat down next to Charlie. "Yes, I was in disbelief too but I woke them up about five minutes ago, Fred! George!"

Arthur asked Bill to pass the peas when there was a thunder coming down the stairs. "Arrgggghhhhh!" the roar of two young boys and there was flying pellets of something small and mushy. Under fire, Arthur looked over and saw George plunge a bright orange toy into a potato. "Fred! George! What are you doing?" Molly yelled. "Tell us!" Fred help up the toy in Bill's direction and George held his in Percy's. "Tell you what?" Arthur said.

"Who's oldest?"

"What? You wasted two potatoes to know which is oldest?" Molly was astounded at the Twin's performance. "Yeah, but we had to punish Bill, Charlie and Percy for trying to convince us we're adopted."

"I had no part in this!" defended Percy looking desperately at his mother to believe him.

"But we didn't buy it," George said proudly, ignoring Percy.

"Sit at the table you two, when you throw out the potatoes don't throw them with our regular garbage, the Gnomes are vicious with those things. No holes in my windows!"

"Does that mean we get to use our beaters bats?" Fred smiled.

"Cool!" said George.


	4. A Joke Where Someone Cries

"First it was Bill, then it was Charlie, then it was Percy, then it was Fred and George, and then it was me, and then it was Ginny's turn, right Dad?"

"Yes, that's right Ron," confirmed Arthur putting his file in his briefcase. "Now, I must get off to work, be good for your mum. Finish your porridge,"

"Ok, I will," said Ron as he looked up from the chair. Arthur kissed him on the forehead and then was out the door.

"You know Dad's lying to you, right?" Fred and George appeared around the corner.

"What would dad lie to me about?"

"You were never in mummy's tummy."

"Yes, I was."

"No, you weren't. You were in someone else's tummy."

"That's not true!" as much fire Ron said it with, Fred and George could see his little ears turning pink.

"It is, her name was Stephanie and she was all by herself and she didn't want you,"

"So, mum offered to take care of you."

Ron felt confused with all the information at once. "She did!"

"She did what, Ron?"

"She did want me!"

"Who wanted you?" asked Fred.

"Because Stephanie didn't," said George.

"That's why mum adopted you," Fred reminded Ron.

"Needless to say, she was disappointed you weren't a little girl," George raised his eyebrows and nodded.

"Well, we got Ginny in the end," sighed Fred.

"Mum wanted me!" Ron said. "Why would dad lie to me!"

Fred hopped onto a chair opposite Ron. "Because he doesn't want you to feel bad," said George, faking sensitivity. "No, but-but-but we-" Ron couldn't think of something that will make it true that he really did share their parents. "That's right, Ron," Fred nodded.

"Mum and dad lied to you your entire little life," George reached out and patted Ron's little hand and he snatched it away. "Take all the time you need," Fred and George snaked out of their chairs and left for upstairs. Ron burst into tears, his porridge went from bearable to undigestable.

Ron continued to go the entire day internalising the news of his true parentage, a woman by herself with a name he can't pronounce. "It's ok," said George after lunch time, slipping him a lolly when their mother's back was turned to clean the dishes. "Mum still loves you."

"Even when you're being _really_ naughty," whispered Fred.

"I'm never naughty," Ron sulked.

"Really? Because mum worked so hard on our lunch and you didn't eat any of it!"

"Seems a bit ungrateful, don't you think? After all she's done for you?" prodded George.

"I wasn't hungry."

"Anyway, we have to go now," said Fred.

"We have to do chores, for our mum. Who we love," taunted George then they slipped away.

Molly turned around to see her little Ron crying. "Oh, Ron what's wrong? Tell me."

Ron shook his head as tears dripped down his face. "Ron, you don't eat your food," Molly gestured to Ron's sandwich, "and you sit there after your meal like your bottom is glued there. Tell me."

Ron shuffled around to give his mother the silent treatment. "Well, I'm not sticking around for your little, whatever this is, tell me when you're ready." Molly walked into the next room to fold some laundry. Ron shuffled off his chair and strode out into the front yard to have a stew. Percy was in an isolated corner of the garden spraying the weeds that were invading their vegetable crops. Ron approached in hopes of some sensible advice. "Perce," Ron's voice wavered. "What is it, Ron?" Percy sighed.

"Mum is my real mum, right?"

Percy looked around at Ron who was rubbing his hands together. "Ron, I don't have time for this, we have to get the house ready for Charlie and Bill. Go inside and be useful."

"Bill's back! And Charlie too!" Arthur announced as Bill and Charlie walked under his arm through the door. "Hello, my big boys," Molly kissed their heads. "I'm sorry I couldn't pick you up, but you had nice time at dad's work, did you?"

"Yeah!" said Charlie cheerily.

"But we couldn't see any of the _cool_ stuff," Bill said moodily.

"Well, that's top-secret stuff, y'know!" Arthur said tapping their heads his hat as they passed.

"Well, I made you a nice big welcome home dinner! And there will be a little treat at the end if everyone is good."

Ron sat there, his fingernails digging under his chair. "Ron, why aren't you getting any food? Bill, put some food on Ron's plate before he misses out," Molly instructed.

Bill sighed and put a couple of spoonful's of mash on Ron's plate.

"Ron, come on," said Arthur.

Ron shook his head. "Come on, Ron what's the big fuss about? You were in a good mood this morning what happened?" Arthur turned to his wife, "what happened?"

Molly shrugged as she served out the sausages. "He didn't eat his porridge or his lunch."

"But you told me you were going to eat your porridge!" said Arthur.

But Ron just frowned even more. And then his chin wobbled.

"Oh, Ron, come on! What's bothering you?"

"Fred and George… Fred and George said I'm adopted. My-my real mummy didn't want me," Ron sobbed.

"Oh, dammit George!"

"Hey! Why doesn't Fred get a dammit too?"

"Poor, underprivileged Fred," Fred shook his head in false woe.

"Dammit, both of you!" corrected Molly fiercely. "Ron didn't eat all day because he was caught up in this silliness? Ron was sulking all day because you convinced him, somehow," Molly gestured to all of their red heads sitting around at the table, "that he wasn't born into this family?"

"Pretty good joke, huh?"

"No, it is not! A joke where someone cries at the end is not a 'good joke'!"

"Well, crying from laughter isn't so bad," Charlie toyed at his mash.

"That is right Charles, but is Ron laughing?"

"No," Charlie murmured.

"Apologise to Ron, now," Molly demanded.

"Come o-" "now," Molly interrupted severely. Fred and George looked over at Bill and Charlie in hopes they will rise to the occasion but Bill just shook his head to say, "you took it way too far." The only person at the table who didn't feel the tension of the Twins' impending apology was Ginny who was shovelling potato into her mouth.

"Sorry, Ron," they mumbled together.

"Is that it?" Arthur said.

They sighed in unison and then went from their slumped over posture at the table Fred and George stood up straight and marched over to Ron at the end of the table. "Ronald Weasley," they said in sync. "We apologise for the pain we caused when we confused you into thinking you were adopted for a day-long period."

Fred and George stuck out their hands to be shaken. Ron smiled as his leftover tears dripped off his face. Ron shook their hand each, "thank you" he said but his voice was muffled as he dried his tears with his sleeve. "Very good boys," praised Arthur.

"How big do you want your slice to be, Ron?" asked Arthur with the knife over the Welcome home cake.

"Big!" Ron said.

"How big?"

"Very big!" Ron shouted.

"Ok, if you think you can handle it," Arthur said, cutting him a big slice (well big for Ron at his age) as Ron watched on in amazement.

"Hey!" Fred and George said. "How come his is so big?"

"He put up with a lot today. I gave you dessert, but you got little because you were mean."

"Fine," said Fred.

As they were cleaning up the plates, George leaned down to whisper in Ron's ear, who was still ploughing through his slice. "You will get your turn with Ginny."


	5. Can't Fool The Girl

Ginny sat with her playhouse in the living room one day when Fred and George joined her. "Can we play Ginny?"

"Sure," Ginny scooted back to back room for her big brothers. George picked up one of the little worn dolls. "That's Bewbumyella," Ginny told George.

"Wow," said George looking at the doll properly. Her brown hair was patchy on her pale head and what remained was tied into two little pigtails. "Who's this?" Fred held up a dark brown doll with lilac-coloured lips who was in much better condition, though still well-loved. "Leema," Ginny said rocking as the doll she was holding danced on the second story of the doll house. "Hmm, and who is that?" Fred pointed to Ginny's doll. "Nella," Ginny said.

"Are they family?"

"No," Ginny shook her head. "They are orphans," Ginny nodded as Nella banged her head against the door way.

"Oh," Fred smiled mischievously at George who nodded back at him.

"You know, Ginny, speaking of orphans, do you know any perchance?"

"No, just in the book that mum reads me."

"Well, I think you do know an orphan," said Fred.

"Who?"

"Why, you! You're adopted!" Fred poked at Ginny's side.

Ginny giggled at Fred, "no I'm not!"

"How do you know that?" George asked.

"Ron told me!" Ginny smiled at George, who looked at Fred.

"Ok Ginny, we'll talk to you later." Fred and George stood up and walk away.

"Bye!"

Fred and George bounded up the stairs to Ron's room. Ron had been enjoying his new room for the past week, a room all to himself! He felt blissful, even if they had the ghoul upstairs and Fred and George directly below him. When Fred and George burst in Ron was proudly dusting off his bookshelf. "When did you do it?" asked Fred out of breath.

"Do what?" Ron was alarmed, feared he was in trouble with his notorious brothers again.

"Tell Ginny she was adopted!" George said, his breathing was starting to get back into pace.

Ron cleared his throat and pretended he needed to turn away to wipe down his chest of drawers, "I didn't."

"What? Then why did she tell us she already knew she wasn't?"

"Well," Ron looked sheepishly at his brothers. "I didn't want to make Ginny cry, so I told her that she was never adopted… And I told her not to believe you if you told her she was."

"Ron," began Fred, "Why did you do that?" George finished.

"Why not? You said it was my turn! I did what I wanted with it."

"If you weren't gonna use it, hand it back! Like ol' Perce did when it was his turn!"

"Well, I didn't 'hand it back', you tried to take it! And I did use it! I told her the punchline before you did you joke!"

"Ok, fine Ron." Said George with a smile. Fred ruffled his head and they turned to walk out the door.

Ron sighed with relief when the door closed behind them.


	6. BONUS: Ron Warns Ginny

"Ginny, can I tell you something?" Ron asked as they played together with her doll house.

Ginny whipped around to look at the littlest of her big brothers, anticipating that Ron was going to tell her about something that the big people talk about. "Hmm-mm," Ginny nodded eagerly. Ron continued to play with Bewbumyella, while he explained. "Ginny, I think Fred and George are going to try and play a joke on you," Ron looked at Ginny to make sure she understood. "No, they aren't!"

"What makes you think that?"

"They never play pranks on me," said Ginny.

"Well, this is a joke that runs in our family. Everyone has done it to the younger one."

"Why are you telling me?"

"Because when Fred and George did it, it was really mean."

"How mean?"

"I cried. A lot."

"But you never cry!" said Ginny as Leema waddled from side to side across the dollhouse. "Oh, trust me I cry a lot. But that time I cried _a lot_ , a lot. Mum was so mad, she yelled at them and made them apologise to me."

"Was I there?" Ginny asked.

"Yeah, but you were only little, so you won't remember. Bill was mad too, which is bad because he started the whole thing. And if you get told off by the person who made up the joke that is like, super bad."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"So, why aren't you doing it? It's your turn."

"Because I'm your brother, and I don't want to make you cry. But when Percy didn't want to do the joke on Fred and George, Charlie and Bill did it instead."

"So, Fred and George might try to take your turn?"

"Exactly. You have to swear you won't believe them when they tell you."

Ginny turned around and looked at her brother who gave her a questioning look. "Ok," Ginny nodded.

"Thanks Ginny."

"For what?" Ginny waddled Leema down the stairs.

"For not laughing when I told you I cried."

"Crying's ok."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, I think so."


End file.
